Episode 99: A Clean Slate for 2017

To everyone who has followed Unlimited Grub Grabs through the years, thank you.

Three weeks have passed since we welcomed the New Year, but while everyone’s done with their resolutions, checklists, and diet plans, I’m still waving around a clean, blank slate. That’s how I intend to start 2017: with a clean slate.

Currently I’m on exile, unemployed and striving to work freelance. At the same time, I‘m catching up on a lot of reading, watching drama series, errands, and self-studying, followed by cooking and sleeping.

I stopped going out on food trips and sightseeing walks. My budget only covers bills and groceries, and if I do so much as have a sip of beer, I’ll suffer gout flare-ups again. Meanwhile, my career as a crime author slowed down. I lost the time and energy to write and I never got to promote my books properly (I thought it no longer mattered since nobody’s reading them anyway).

On top of all that, my motivation and self-respect were in the dumps. I’ve been insomniac and frequently hungry and thirsty. When I fall asleep, I sleep for long hours. Most of the time, I’m lethargic. There are moments when I imagine jumping from my window at the fifth floor. And yeah, I wallow in moments of self-depreciation. I won’t be surprised if I get diagnosed as undergoing depression.

But I promised myself that’s about to change this 2017. This year is meant for new beginnings, going back to zero, starting over from scratch.

I still have my knowledge base. I still have my health. I still maintain a blog. I still have my social media accounts. I still have writing opportunities to explore. I still have ideas and stories. I still have restaurants to visit. Most of all, I have people who support me from afar, who have faith in me and my resolution to rise from my travails. I don’t see them, but I know they’re there.

I know Unlimited Grub Grabs isn’t popular, and my writing isn’t influential. I’m probably not the best role model for writers. But despite my flaws and insecurities, I know you’ve patiently watched over me, and cheered me in my endeavors. I know I’ve imparted as many lessons, thoughts, and experiences as I can through my stories. I know you’re watching me grow.

I’m thankful that I’ve been blessed with so much, and as gratitude, I will make use of my abilities to begin anew. For staying with me through my journeys all this time, I thank you.

With this post, I now leave behind the doubts and failures brought by 2016, along with the victories and successes I gained. At the same time, I look forward to the changes that will be brought by 2017.

As for this blog, who knows? There’s so much to do rather than dwell in the past. Like, for example, a new book or anthology that needs filling up, or maybe a food park somewhere. Maybe a new blog…

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